A little lesson on sexual coercion
There is a current trend on social media now where ladies come out to accuse men of rape, then people make comments and you wonder what is going in society no respect for individual sexual rights anymore. The most recent one was the story of a lady who accused a guy of rape and in the guys defense she achieved orgasm and he also had to achieve his own orgasm so he held her down to finish what he started so yes that is rape already consent was already withdrawn but that is not the point of this post, the real question is why would a lady withdraw consent during sex?
My answer sexual coercion. This is a term most people might not be familiar with or not, the only reason anyone would withdraw consent is that there was sexual coercion prior to sex and halfway the person turns off and withdraws consent.
What is Sexual Coercion?
Sexual coercion is an unwanted sexual activity that happens when you are pressured, tricked, threatened, or forced in a nonphysical way. Coercion can make you think you owe sex to someone. No one is ever required to have sex with someone else.
Note the key words there pressured, tricked, threatened or forced. Most guys get sex through sexual coercion, valentines day is another day for many vaginas to be slaughtered all in the name of love, part of why I don’t like valentines day.
How does sexual coercion work?
1) Being worn down by someone who repeatedly asks for sex. This is a move, it is exhausting being repeatedly asked for sex from an individual its bad, girls get tired and then say just do what you have to do and leave me alone some girls fake orgasms because of this. The attraction is not mutual.
2) Being lied to or being promised things that weren’t true to trick you into having sex. This is common amongst older men, a young vulnerable girl is promised to have a better life all she needs to do is have sex with the man, the end result usually is you get showered with gifts at the beginning and get all buttered up you fall for it and then the gestures begin to decline then it becomes men are scum!!
3) Having someone threaten to end a relationship or spread rumors about you if you don’t have sex with them. I call the first a fuck boy move if you find yourself in a situation where someone threatens to end a relationship my advice walk away! It wont be easy but trust me walk away. The other let the person spread the rumour you too cook up a rumour about the guy say he has an STD or say his sex game is terrible he ejaculates in 2 minutes since we all want to be petty! or if you don’t want that approach just ignore no one ever died from a rumor ( being petty is still a lovely approach)
4) Having an authority figure, like a boss or professor pressure you into having sex. This is not so far fetched too. If you know a higher authority than that person that can be trusted report to that person if it’s the case of a lecturer female lecturers can be very helpful in cases like this, find a way to get yourself out of that situation.
If you are in a relationship you should not be forced to have sex when you don’t want to, if you are not sexually active don’t let anyone force you, have sex because you want to not because you feel pressured to, sexual contact without your consent is assault.
I hope this was helpful, sharing excites me please share, like and drop a comment.
Stop painting women as victims and men as predictors. We are all adults, if he raped you, there is a judicial process and courts to handle this, and he would go to jail if found guilty. On the other hand, we’re all adults and we should own up to the responsibilities of being an adult. You cannot cry victim and shout feminism at the same time; you cannot claim that he coerced you and at the same time say that you’re an independent woman. The world doest work that way, especially when you’re an adult this the rational ability to make decisions and bear the consequences of your actions
Well said.
For coming readers, and you Jummy:
https://artsandafrica.com/coitus-currency-39a26a5e1a43.
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